Loss hits home

...and it sucks.

It's not the first time I've lost someone close to me, but I'm far from a pro, and I truly hope that's not something I ever become. We've lost grandparents, great-grandparents, those you expect are toward the end of their journey, that's really all I've had to face losing. But last year, we lost a friend; a mentor. Someone who had spoken into my life since I was a child and became a dear friend as an adult. Someone who helped mend my marriage when things were falling apart. That loss rocked our world. It's the first time that we lost someone so unexpectedly and it left a daily void in our lives. Grief just sucks.

Today, we're experiencing that process of loss again. Yesterday we went to visit our friend in the hospital and pray over him and his family. Praying for someone you love to leave this world and join Jesus is HARD, beyond anything I can even begin to express. When all you want to do is scream "Stand up and walk!", but you know what's left here can't compete with that 9 minute glimpse he likely already had of heaven, nor should it. So we prayed for the Lord to take him home and for peace beyond comprehension to comfort those left here.

We reminisced about the countless lives he's touched. Lester was the biggest pest I've ever known. We often have laughed about opening his big mouth when he told me it was time to lay off the donuts as I entered the 2nd trimester of pregnancy #2. Up until the last conversation we had, he swears he didn't know I was pregnant and thought I was just "putting on some extra pounds". I've never believed that part, but this was Lester the Pester after all, and the joke was never over. He loved to pick at people, but not in a hateful or rude way. He was just that ornery little brother type that loved to get a rise out of you. And then he'd hug your neck and tell you how much he loved you and you couldn’t help but forgive him.

This morning, before we walked into the church, I told my kids that today, we get to help fill a void for our friend. You see, he wasn't just a pain in the butt, that loved pestering more than most things on earth, but he was also one of the most giving people I've ever known. Lester and Sandy have been faithful members of our church for years. They have come hours early every Sunday and prepared communion, brewed the coffee, prepared the parking cones and crosswalk, and absolutely anything else that needs done, long before everyone else arrives. If there was something to be carried, he was all over it, often meeting me outside when he'd see me pull up, because he knew I was probably toting supplies. Multiple times throughout the morning I would hear, "Is there anything you need? What can I do to help?" And I know that wasn't unique to me, he was there for all of us.

Above all else, I missed his hug when I walked in this morning. The gap that Lester, the big teddy bear pester, has left won't be easily filled. I will miss my friend immensely, but I will continue to serve in his honor. Lester loved people. He loved to make them laugh. He loved to lighten their load, physcially and emotionally. He brightened the day of everyone near, in whatever way he could find. That's an example I will strive to follow for the remainder of my days. And some day, maybe I will be able to scoop those darn coffee grounds with a smile, instead of thru tears, as I remember my friend.